Shocking Poolio

Farmer H started getting Poolio ready for the summer a couple weekends ago. Poolio is still not ready for the summer.

The Pony had hoped to get a few lazy days of floating around on an air mattress before shoving off for Missouri Scholars Academy. Now he will just be fish-belly white, with perhaps a hint of farmer's tan from walking the minipony.

This morning as we left for my doctor's appointment, The Pony said, "I'll get the pony out today, but I'm not getting in the pool." I thought he was referring to the overcast weather we were supposed to have in the afternoon. On the way home, the truth came out. "Have you SEEN the pool? It's full of algae."

"You were in it on Sunday."

"It was just cloudy then. This morning it was green."

"That's funny. Your dad bought a bunch of chemicals and put them in last night."

"And your point IS?"

When we got home, I took a look. Poolio was so pitiful that I could not even bring myself to command The Pony to take a picture. That's the thing with Farmer H. He won't simply empty that pool at the beginning of summer and start with fresh well water. No. He tries to keep the same water that's been in Poolio for nigh on five years. Or more. He looks at that water like sourdough starter. Or the grease from that restaurant that deep-fries its hamburgers.

I don't know what's so bad about filling Poolio with fresh water. Don't cost nothin'. The water will have to warm up the same as that buttwater soup that's been under the pool cover all winter. But no. Farmer H tests the water (or so he says), then adds a chemical to balance the imbalance. Which of course goes too far the opposite way. Like how fixing the cloudiness resulted in an overgrowth of algae IN ONE NIGHT! Now he'll add too much of something else, and Poolio will go back to cloudy. I swear. It's like he slaps one cheek, then slaps the other when Poolio's head turns. Again and again and again. Poolio is punch-drunk.

Maybe Poolio will be in swimming shape by Labor Day.