Sunday, February 28, 2016

SWEET! Along With The Bitter...

Perhaps Mrs. Hillbilly Mom's fellow Newmentia faculty do not understand the meaning of, "I'd prefer that you don't discuss my upcoming retirement with the pupils, because it is not really their business."

Perhaps we should break that down word by word. Starting with DON'T, followed by DISCUSS, RETIREMENT, and PUPILS. Uh huh. And make big posters with those definitions, for everybody to hang in their room. And have them recite the definitions each morning, just like we do the Pledge of Allegiance every Monday. Only more often, you see, until the message becomes clear.

Just when I though I had nipped Italian Chandelier's retirement talk in the bud, I find out that she's been at it again. AND my best ol' ex-teaching buddy Mabel's successor was at it only last Friday. I wouldn't have known, since I don't have pupils in common with her. Except for The Pony. Who sings like a canary.

"Mom. You're going to love this. I have to tell you! Last week, Ms. Cardiac was talking about your retirment--"

"WHAT? I have told them NOT to talk about my retirement! I can't believe that SHE, of all people, would do such a thing! I save seats for her! I thought she was nice! That is out of line!"

"No, Mom. It wasn't like that. I think she just said, to me, in class, 'Pony, I'm going to miss your mom. She's so witty.' And then some of the kids, not many, Mom, because there's only seven of us in there, it's that AP class, asked why she was going to miss you. And Ms Cardiac said you were retiring. And they said, 'But she's not OLD ENOUGH to retire!' They started asking me how old you are, but I wouldn't tell them. So they started guessing. And do you know how old they think you are? You're going to love this, Mom! They thought you were between 40 and 43!"

"Oh. I guess it's okay that you talked about me in class."

Heh, heh! I haven't heard such a travesty of pupils judging ages since a whole crop of them though Arch Nemesis was older that Mabel!

That made my day.


Sioux said...

When my students guess how old I am, they start with 30 (I have a daughter who's 36...)and keep going up in increments of 10. 50? 60? 70? (I tell them, "I WISH I was still 70.") They are clueless.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

Not old enough to retire! Nice.

fishducky said...

My mind is 36 but my body is 81--where does that put me?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Hey! Are you Penelope (pronounced PEN uh lope by The Pony) on SNL?

Well let me tell you this! The teachers at Newmentia actually think I'm still a fetus! Uh huh. THAT'S how young I look...

NO! Appearances can be deceiving. No kids are going to keep ME from retiring!

Right out of the 13-year-old-self club! You'll have to form your own 36-year-old self club. Maybe Madam above, and her daughter, can join you.