Monday, July 4, 2016

Mrs. Hillbilly Mom Predicts A Harsh Winter For Hillmomba

No, Mrs. Hillbilly Mom has not chucked the whole teaching thing to immerse herself in training for a new career as a TV meteorologist. But she DID stay at a Holiday Inn Express two weeks ago! Oh, and she saw her first Woolly Bear Caterpillar today.

He was not very big. Not exactly a woolly mammoth of a Woolly Bear. Quite small, actually. About an inch long. You might notice that Mr. W. Bear was black at both ends, with only a narrow belt of rusty orange. According to folklore, that means a severe winter. The broader the belt, the milder the winter. If you believe that sort of thing.

It makes Mrs. HM no nevermind if the winter is severe. As long as she doesn't lose her electricity, of course, in her all-electric Mansion. Because Mrs. HM will simply stay home, watch the news for school closings as has been her habit these past 28 years, and sit back in the La-Z-Boy with a cup of hot chocolate and let it snow, let it snow, let it snow. Farmer H will have sure-footed T-Hoe to drive to work. OR he may even be retired himself, if that severe winter comes after January 1.

THE HORROR!

Mrs. Hillbilly Mom is going to wait a bit before she makes her official long-range winter forecast. The persimmon seeds haven't spoken yet. This year, she will make sure Farmer H gets her a persimmon before they all fall off the tree and get eaten by Billy the Goat and Barry the Mini Pony.

Not that accuracy is a requirement for a TV meteorologist, you know.

4 comments:

Sioux said...

Since you're retired, you should hope for a mild winter, so all the teachers have no snow days...while you relax at home.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
Nah. I'm a giver, you know. So I wish them all the snow days meteorologically possible.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

It was supposed to be 90 degrees by noon here today and that didn't happen. You can forecast the weather just fine.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Kathy,
It felt like 90 here this evening, but my phone says it only reached 82. It was CLOSE! Which is what my mother said when the humidity was oppressive. "It's so CLOSE!"