The Shocking Of Puppy Jack

As you may know, having had it pounded into your eyeballs for weeks on end, Puppy Jack is a wanderer. More accurately, he's an SD. A poop-stirrer. A canine ne'er-do-well just looking for a place to never do well. He has not had his very special operation yet because...well...what doggie mama wants that for her four-legged furry baby? I have been dragging my feet. Jack, himself, has not. Those big feet go skipping across the Mansion's front field like Jack's a bunny hopping for joy.

The problem is when Jack leaves the Mansion grounds for those of either neighbor. I have been trying to train him with a shock collar. For small dogs, 8-20 pounds, and college boys, 140-160 pounds.

Here's the thing: I'm not so sure Jack even feels the shock!

I make sure I turn on the collar part, with the two shocking prongs. I have adjusted it to fit tight against Jack's neck. He comes to me willingly, every afternoon, when I go out for my driveway walk. Runs right up to me, all happy and hyper, to stand on the side porch while I'm down on the sidewalk, and put his front paws on my shoulders and try to lick my teeth. I snap on his collar, and we're ready for walkies.

My Sweet, Sweet Juno has been problematic. Some days, she hogs the side porch like a 7-foot center guarding the paint, not letting Jack get close enough to me for collaring, even though he dashes in and spins around and does his best to reach me. On those days, Juno gets chastised, and retreats to her house to sulk. She comes out by the time we reach the driveway, though, to feint and growl and bite at Jack. AND HIS SHOCK COLLAR. I swear Juno turns it off.

Even I, not an engineer, know that putting a push button to control the on/off function of a shock collar on the outside edge of the collar is a bit questionable. Juno and Jack bite and wrestle, and she must push that button numerous times during my 20-minute walk. It needs to be recessed. Like, so you could poke the end of your pinky finger down in there and activate it. Or go by a sliding switch that a bumping/biting dog can't move.

Many a day, I've put the collar on Jack and tested it to see the green light. But when I take it off after we're done, it shows the red light. I know the shocker works. I tried it in the house the other day, with only one finger on one prong, and that sucker STILL bit me! I guess it arced. I've had to jack it up (heh, heh, see what I did there, JACK it up, for Puppy Jack) from the 4 setting that the #1 son recommended, to the next level, on 2. Which is really like putting it on 10.

Only twice have I seen a reaction from Jack that makes me think he felt it. I start by saying, "Jack, NO!" when he starts to go off course. Sometimes he stops, and I praise him. When he doesn't, I push the green button that makes a buzzing sound. I don't think this collar has a vibration setting, but it has that sound. Even Juno hears it, and sometimes whimpers and starts after Jack, like when she tries to get between him and his humping cat. To keep him out of trouble.

If Jack still keeps going after the buzzer, I say, "Jack, NO!" again, and I hold down the shocker. The two times I noticed, Jack kind of jumped sideways and looked at me. Like he did in mid-air that day I shot him (not proud, people, not proud) with the BB gun. One of those days he came running back to me, like he wanted to tell me something odd had happened to him, and he wanted comforting. I felt like a real heel, but learning to control yourself is never a picnic.

That other day I thought Jack noticed the shock, he stopped to give me that look, then kept on running toward the horses. Who were tempting him to bark by moving slowly with their giant hooves and chewing on hay from a round bale right there in their own field.

There has been some progress, though. Most of the time now, Jack comes back to me when I push the buzzer. Sometimes even when I say, "Jack, NO!" It's like he thinks the buzzer is a signal for him to come running and jump against my legs while I am walking.

We need to work on that...