Saturday evening, I was scratching my scratchers around 5:00, debating on when to start warming Farmer H's supper. He is usually home from his SUS2 (Storage Unit Store 2) activities by then. Sometimes earlier, if business is slow, or if there's a NASCAR race he plans to watch.
His supper was going to be warmed-up chicken and dumplings from the night before. The quick kind I make with flour tortillas boiled for 5 minutes in chicken broth and cream of chicken soup (minced garlic, black pepper, and butter added), then chicken stirred in when it's done. Farmer H LOVES it!
Anyhoo... I didn't want to start too soon, because that meal sticks to the pan. I waited. And waited. And waited some more. Finally, at 6:15, I got out the chicken and dumplings, and put them in a pan. Turned on the burner to the lowest setting. That would take about 20 minutes to heat up, from being in FRIG II.
Could I have sent a text to Farmer H asking where he was? Yes. But the day before, I'd sent a text telling him that I put his Diet Mountain Dews out of T-Hoe's rear and onto the chair on the side porch... and he walked right by them. Said he never got my text. He doesn't like me to call, because sometimes he's waiting on a call (or ON a call) with a government agency that must approve certain sales.
You'd think that if a man is going to be late for supper, he'd let the supper-preparer know.
Farmer H walked in at 6:30.
"Did you get lost on your way home?"
"No. There was people kept coming in, HM. So I wasn't going to close when I had customers!"
"Too bad there's not something like a cell phone you could use to notify me."
"Well. You say I always call at the wrong time."
"You DO. If I'm driving or in the store, I won't answer. But you could leave a text. Or call back. That's a long time to be late. I was trying to figure out your supper. It's probably ready now."
"My phone has been acting up. I still ain't got that text you sent yesterday."
Yeah, sure. Always an excuse. A woman should just expect her man to get there when he gets there, I suppose, with supper ready to eat.
It will come as no surprise that when Farmer H dipped his dumplings from the pan into his bowl, he once again held the bowl in his left hand while standing at the stove, and rooted around in the pan with a spoon in his right hand.
"There you go again. If you were SMART, which I'm pretty sure you're not... you'd set that bowl on the stove, hold the pan above it with one hand, and spoon the dumplings over the side with the spoon in the other hand."
"You just don't like it because I'm not doing it YOUR way!"
"Just saying, you can chase that pan around for five minutes trying to stop it moving with your belly. Or you can hold it with your other hand while you dip out your food."
The fact that common sense so often eludes Farmer H is a mystery to me.
6 comments:
So happy to know that after my long absence from the land of Blog, most things remain the same!!
Farmer H cannot change his spots. Nor his illogical habits. He even rebutted my admonitions concerning the dirty water drops from "washing" his hands, with "That's from my ARMS, HM! Not from my hands!" So apparently he uses his arms to grasp the top of the paper towel roll to tear one off.
Another option is he could just eat straight from the warming pan since the food was all his. Fewer dishes to be washed that way too.
River,
Yes! And it has a convenient handle. Maybe I'll suggest that to him next time.
In the days before cell phones, we owned a business that required long hours of my husband’s time. So, he would give me a call to tell me he was heading home so I, like you, could reheat his supper because the rest of the family had eaten earlier. MANY (so many) times he wouldn’t show for a couple of hours…..#*!!😡😡. ONE TIME I did that to him by accident. I got distracted on something I was doing at a house we were renovating. (See, our lives are parallel) anyway, he went ballistic…couldn’t believe I could do such a thing after telling him I would be there. Funny how the shoe on the other foot doesn’t fit so well when they are affected.
Pudge450,
Heh, heh! I was just telling Farmer H yesterday how he lives by the credo "Rules for thee, but not for me!" Definitely a double standard. He has always roamed free, not even mentioning his whereabouts, yet it was an imposition for him when I was taking one night a week to go out to supper with my mom, or one night every couple months to play trivia on a Saturday night with my co-workers.
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