Thursday, March 15, 2012

Neither Fish Nor Fowl

Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the cafeteria...

They served fish. Catfish strips. You'd think they were like fish sticks. Indeed, one week, early in the school year, they were. And another week, they tasted like the catfish we get at the local "kettle" restaurant. It's known for good eatin'! But the very last time the cafeteria served these catfish portions, they tasted fishy! I know! Of all the things kids don't want in their catfish, it's a fishy taste. So I did not eat the school lunch today. Even though the side dish was macaroni and cheese. As all consumers of the cafeteria macaroni and cheese say, "That's the most tasteless macaroni and cheese I ever ate." 300 critics can't be wrong.

According to the #1 son, I made a good decision. "That fish today tasted like crap! Like the smoke that clears after you shoot off fireworks. It was terrible!"

I don't know why he's complainin'. At least he didn't find one with a scale attached.

Disclaimer: As any science aficionado knows, catfish don't have scales. But catfish should not taste fishy, either. So perhaps the food supplier pulled the old switercheroo. No. That would be when you poison your drink and then switch it with the other person's. And we all know there's no drinking or poisoning in school. But...they might have substituted a more economical version of our fine finned friends. Which does not lend itself for an ending with a punch.

6 comments:

Sioux Roslawski said...

Perhaps it was the deadliest of all school cafeteria fish...the "Pink Slime" fish? If I were you, I'd check it out.

labbie1 said...

I have always thought that catfish tasted, well, muddy--as does Tilapia to me. But that is just me I guess. Other people love those fish...

knancy said...

Why don't they just come clean about their food products and start serving pink slime smoothies for all meals!?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
That is quite possible. And it wouldn't surprise me if this supplier started using transparent slime, what with the cost of pink these days.

************
labbie,
Catfish fried in peanut oil and slathered with tartar sauce is quite tasty. At least at our local all-you-can eat restaurant. I might even be persuaded to divorce my new imaginary spouse, Grilled Cheese, and marry it. Sorry, Bacon.

************
knancy,
Indeed. Then we won't need to chew, burning even fewer calories.

I don't get how people complain that we're raising a generation of fat kids, when the school lunch program is feeding them breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Even through the summer months. Yes, that's three fingers pointing back at YOU, School Lunch Program.

It's not like kids can drive themselves to the all-you-can-eat catfish house every night.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

School cafeteria food was always mysterious to me. Everyday it smelled the same, no matter what was served .....

Hillbilly Mom said...

Kathy,
Here's what's worse. We smell things that are never served. Chocolate cake. Ham and beans. Hot rolls. Maybe there are some cans of scent that they spray into the ventilation system.