Monday, July 22, 2019

I'm Pretty Sure It's Farmer H's Fault

I've slept about eight hours in two days. Not even braggin'! I'd like to sleep more. There's no reason to get up early except on Fridays, to get to the post office before 11:30. Which necessitates leaving the Mansion by 10:30. And getting up by 9:00.

I've even trained myself to sleep through the jolly-good-fellow jouncing every morning at 7:30, when Farmer H perches on the edge of the bed to put on his pants, socks, and work boots. In fact, I'd planned on sleeping in until 10:00 (!) on Sunday morning. I know, that's scandalous. But I hadn't gone to bed until 4:30 a.m., because I got caught up in a movie.

It wasn't even a particularly good movie. It was Drillbit Taylor, with Owen Wilson and that kid who's on The Goldbergs now. I'd set it to record earlier in the evening. When browsing through my DVRs, I noticed that the little screen was black. Huh! Did that mean the channel I was recording was out? I tried to click out and watch it, but the screen was still black! Dang it! I'll be darned if I record three hours (lots of commercials) of black screen. So I stopped the recording. Turned the DISH off and on. And there it was! My channel was working. Good thing it was on a commercial. I started recording again.

Anyhoo... by the time I started watching that movie (it had actually recorded, not black screen), it was 3:00 a.m. The movie was pretty good. I didn't want to stop. But at 4:30, I had to. I was snoozing pretty good, too, after getting up for the bathroom at 6:30. Farmer H was already out of the house when I woke again at 8:15.

The reason for my wakage was a buzzing in my ear. A MOSQUITO! I hate that high-pitched buzz! It was by my left ear. I was laying on my back at the time, and I reached over like a fancy performer slapping a tambourine beside my head, clapping both hands, trying to catch kill that blood-sucker. I thought I might have. Didn't hear it any more.

Until 15 minutes later. That's right Same reaction. Same assumption. Same result. Every 15 minutes, that mosquito buzzed in my ear. I finally gave up and got up. At 9:00. Really tired.

I'm pretty sure a mosquito in the bedroom is Farmer H's fault. He's probably growing larvae in his breather reservoir. Now I have an itchy bite on my back crack area. Above it. Like where you might get a tramp stamp, if you got it from a really bad tattoo parlor, and they didn't center it, but put it three inches to the right.

I don't know how that mosquito bit me there. It must have been when I rolled over to look at the clock before getting up.

4 comments:

Kathy's Klothesline said...

So, you are scratching your high butt area all day? I am sure he let the mosquito in the house. The flies are driving me crazy here. Every time I manage to kill the door opens and three fly in.

Sioux Roslawski said...

So I admit it. I looked up the movie, wondering which Goldbergs kid was in the movie. I almost missed him. That husky kid--he's the same actor who plays the older brother, right?

(He was much younger then. I know. What a surprise--someone was younger back in the past.)

It's too bad that Farmer H and you can't float along in your own little bubbles, so you both can enjoy your retirement.

River said...

That does seem like an odd place for a mosquito bite, the little buggers must have taken classes in creative thinking.
I've got a high pitched buzzing in my left ear too, but it's my tinnitus acting up, a side effect of particular medications.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Kathy,
Yes. I sneak a scratch when I can. The waistband of my pants makes it itch. I'm sure Farmer H let in the mosquito, if he didn't outright breed it in the captivity of the bedroom. I'VE never let in a mosquito! Though I do take the blame for at least half of the flies. I've seen them get in while giving the dogs their treats at the kitchen door.

***
Sioux,
Yes! I thought one of the names looked familiar in the opening credits, and then I heard his voice, and thought WHO is that? It took about 15 minutes to figure it out, and that was due to the way he talks. He's got something that makes him quite watchable.

I could do without a bubble of my own, if we could put Farmer H in a hamster ball.

***
River,
Quite odd, because I read that they are attracted to your breath when you exhale, and I guarantee you that my butt wasn't exhaling! It also bit me on the back of both elbows! Too bad about your tinnitus, but at least it isn't biting you!