Wednesday, January 8, 2020

Sop On, Sop Off...The Sopper!

You may recall that busy beaver Farmer H actually fixed the reluctantly-flushing toilet last week. It was difficult for me to remain conscious after this earth-shattering occurrance, but I managed. Once I regained my equilibrium a few hours later, I noticed that Farmer H's bath towel was missing from the shower door. My own towel hangs on the towel rack on the wall. Green for me (my favorite color, and it matches the forest green of the master bathroom tile). A shade of maroon for him. I don't know why. The Devil's Playground must have had a deal on that color many years ago.

Anyhoo...as I surveyed my kingdom from my throne, I also noticed a maroon towel carelessly flopped over the edge of the big triangle tub, just past my lair-wear dark blue sweatpants with the gray and white stripes. Huh. WHY would Farmer H's towel be over there? We use our towels for a couple days, then I wash them and hang clean ones. Same colors. I was so giddy with delight after flushing, actually FLUSHING the toilet that I forgot about that maroon towel.

Until it appeared in the laundry room, draped over a lattice-patterned tall plastic basket that we use as a hamper. Well now! This would not do! Since the boys left home, I don't dump clothes from this container into the wash. It's almost always empty. It only held a few items now, that had come from my suitcase after our one-night casino stay when returning The Pony halfway to college. Not a full load. Besides, I normally gather our towels from the bathroom and wash them with my clothes. Farmer H, you know, does his own laundry, in his longstanding punishment to himself for being hard-headed about leaving his dirty clothes on the floor.

It dawned on me that Farmer H had USED HIS TOWEL FOR TOILET PURPOSES! To sop up water that was likely dripping during his removal of the old flush unit.

Sweet Gummi Mary! I was NOT going to wash a TOILET TOWEL with my clothes! Besides, the day I noticed that toilet towel in the laundry room was the day after Farmer H had washed his jeans. I call shenanigans! Surely he could have washed his own toilet towel! Of course I broached this subject with Farmer H.

"Oh, I guess I'm supposed to wash your TOILET TOWEL!"

"It's a towel, HM. My bath towel."

"You're not USING it as a bath towel! You've moved it around, trying to make ME wash it."

"It's just water."

"It's TOILET water!"

"Only from the tank. I did it when I was replacing the flush unit."

"I'm not washing that toilet towel with my clothes. Or MY bath towels!"

"[Chuckle, Chuckle] You get the craziest ideas."

"YOU just washed your jeans! I notice you didn't include the toilet towel in THAT load."

"[Chuckle, Chuckle] You drive me crazy."

"YOU are the one pawning off a toilet towel on ME! I'll get to it when I get to it."

You can bet it's going right back into Farmer H's towel rotation.
Maroon for him. Green for me.

3 comments:

Sioux Roslawski said...

Just put it somewhere to dry, and then act like it's been washed. He'd think that is okay, if he knew, because according to him, it was just water.

That maroon towel has been flagged!

River said...

Farmer H is right, it is only water, so I don't see a problem washing the towel with anything else. It's exactly the same water that goes through all the pipes in your house. Of course we (I) can't be sure the floor he mopped with that towel was spotless, it could have pee splash on it, in which case the towel still needs to be washed but perhaps with his clothes not yours. On the other hand, the washing machine washes and then rinses everything so it all comes out in the wash, right?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
Shame on me! For a minute, I actually considered taking the TOILET TOWEL back to the shower, to hang on the door handle for Farmer H! No.

I might wash it tomorrow. NOT with my clothes. It looks like Farmer H is about due to wash his whites, judging the pile of underwear and socks on the upside down LID of his plastic hamper basket. Because the basket itself is almost empty of his clean whites. He could throw in the towel, heh, heh! Sadly, it is several years old, and won't turn his whites pink.

***
River,
That is technically correct. But even if Farmer H took a pipe off the sink and replaced it, and laid the drippy one on that towel...I wouldn't want it washed with my clothes. I'm funny like that. And I'm pretty sure the inside of the toilet tank isn't as pristine as a clean sink. Farmer H might as well dip that towel in the green water of the fake fish pond, as far as I'm concerned. I consider it UNCLEAN!