Between There And Hillmomba Is Limbo

Surely you didn't think Farmer H's wayward Christmas gift would actually arrive yesterday as the original USPS Tracking Number had predicted. No siree, Bob! There was no package and no notice when we got home at 5:00. Sure, the notice had said it would be here by 9:00 p.m. But everybody knows that Hillmomba rolls up the sidewalks at 5:00.  

 

We had a brief glimmer of hope when playing a phone message, and the lady down the gravel road said she had a package for me. But the phone said the message was from "Wednesday," so we realized it was the old message about a different package, since we've never known the USPS to be ahead of schedule on anything.

 

At least I could get on the tracking website again. Here is the most recent history of Farmer H's gift. Remember to read from the bottom up for chronological order.

 

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January 11, 2021, 7:32 pm
Departed USPS Regional Destination Facility
SAINT LOUIS MO NETWORK DISTRIBUTION CENTER 
Your item departed our SAINT LOUIS MO NETWORK DISTRIBUTION CENTER destination facility on January 11, 2021 at 7:32 pm. The item is currently in transit to the destination.

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January 11, 2021, 7:13 pm
Arrived at USPS Regional Destination Facility
SAINT LOUIS MO NETWORK DISTRIBUTION CENTER 

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January 11, 2021
In Transit to Next Facility

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January 8, 2021, 4:34 am
Departed USPS Regional Facility
PALATINE IL DISTRIBUTION CENTER   

 

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So... it took three days to get from Illinois to Missouri. To ST. LOUIS, which is, for River's benefit, just across the RIVER from Illinois! Although Palatine is in Cook County, which is in or by Chicago. A drive of 4 hours and 39 minutes, according to my estranged BFF Google. 

 

Sweet Gummi Mary! It's half the distance from Hillmomba to Norman, Oklahoma! We could drive THAT in 9 hours! But Farmer H's gift took THREE DAYS for a 4 hour 39 minute drive. I guess it was strapped to the back of a Big Wheel, pedaled by a three-year-old, who had to stay out of traffic and take the back roads.

 

Who really knows where that package is now? Besides IN TRANSIT. I think it goes down to Casino Town, and then back up to the Sis-Town main post office. I hope keys and gas pumps are still remembered by the time Farmer H's gift arrives in the near or far future...