Well, good luck stopping me! At least you can stop reading if I already told this one. I can't remember.
Back when we were having our packages mis-delivered, the one lady who actually drove to the Mansion and got out to hand over our package was taking a little time to get out of her JEEP. The Pony and I stood on the porch, calling to the dogs, thinking she was afraid. She wasn't. She just thought she had another package of ours, but it turned out to be with another driver.
Juno had come up on the porch with me like a good girl. Copper Jack stood in the front yard, barking his fool head off. The Pony had stepped down on Farmer H's rebuilt brick sidewalk, and was calling to Copper Jack to distract him. He's all bark.
Little Jack, such a friendly fellow, stayed over by the JEEP, prancing along beside that lady as she brought our package to the porch. As she walked, I heard her say to him,
"Look at you! You're SO FAT! Look at you!"
That kind of hurt my feelings! Little Jack is not portly! He's a half-wiener dog! Not a bratwurst! Of course he's not as streamlined as an actual dachshund. His heeler half is a stocky breed! Anyhoo... it's true that even I had mentioned to Farmer H that Jack looked like someone else had been feeding him.
"Jack looks like he just ate a full meal! Have you been giving him frozen cherry pies over at the BARn?"
Farmer H said he had not. But that the dogs had been feasting on leftover, discarded deer carcasses, since it was near the end of deer season, and some hunters only harvested the best parts and left the skin and bones on the ground.
Anyhoo... my point is that Jack was a little chubbier than he usually is. He's half HOUND, you know, and they will eat anything they can get in their mouth. I'm sure that delivery lady didn't mean anything by it, but I was sad for Jack. Who I'm sure did not mind at all!
Wait a minute! I hope that lady wasn't talking about ME!
4 comments:
Of course she wasn't talking about you! That would be insulting and could earn her a reprimand if you were to put in a complaint.
I think Little Jack will be fine as long as his belly doesn't prevent his paws from reaching the ground.
River,
She was nice and friendly otherwise, so I don't THINK she was talking about me!
Jack is back to normal now. He's so feisty and active that he works off his extra gorging, as long as he doesn't have an unending deer-carcass buffet. He was just round, like a barrel, and not saggy in the belly like from long-term obesity!
Was she fat? If she was you could have agreed that she was indeed fat. That would be mean, though.
Kathy,
No, she was regular size. Neither thick nor thin. So I ASSumed she was talking to little temporarily-fat Jack.
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