Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Hoppin’ Poppies!


Monday, at the Semi-Weekly Meeting of the Newmentia Lunch Time Think Tank, a recent news item was discussed by the brain trust.

“Hey! Did you read about that little girl who took heroin to daycare?”

“Yeah. Two hundred and forty bags.”

“TWO HUNDRED AND FORTY BAGS?”

“Yeah. They were little bags.”

“She passed them out like candy. She thought it WAS candy.”

“Wow. How many kids ate the candy?”

“They don’t know. The kids were all napping. Heh, heh. Not really. I made that up.”

“What’s a kid doing with 240 bags of heroin?”

“She took her mother’s backpack by mistake.”

“Who has so much heroin laying around the house that they don’t miss 240 bags?”

“TWO HUNDRED AND FORTY BAGS OF HEROIN! That’s a lot of money!”

“Why do you all sound so envious of a person with 240 bags of heroin?”

“Haha! We DO sound like that!”

“Let’s just call it a day already. We made it to lunch. That’s good enough.”

“It is on a snow day. Feed ‘em lunch and we call it a day. Remember that year they were barely done cleaning up from breakfast, and we started lunches at 9:00 o’clock?”

“Yeah. That was a good day.”

“What are you complaining about now? Haven’t you only had two classes so far?”

“One, really. The other is my class of two boys, and since their work was all done, they slept.”

“What did you do, bring your daughter’s backpack by mistake, and give them heroin?”

“No! That would have made them hyper.”

The Newmentia Lunch Time Think Tank may talk big when it comes to heroin, but it seems that some of them are not nearly so experienced with smack, the horse, White Lotus, yam yam, the Chinaman's night cap…as J. Peterman. Apparently they’ve never watched The Wizard of Oz, even once. Because everybody knows that heroin comes from poppies, and that Dorothy and her crew laid down for a nap before they could get across that poppy field.

I daresay, though, that the Newmentia Lunch Time Think Tank could tell you plenty about flying monkeys.

2 comments:

Sioux Roslawski said...

Yeah, there's a flying monkey at my school I'd like to escape from...

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
We in Hillmomba do not harbor fugitives, Madam. Plan your escape accordingly.