This morning
Mrs. Hillbilly Mom sat at her desk, grading papers. Her students were given
free rein to move about the classroom, having behaved themselves during the
lesson, and being her very bestest class. Just before the bell, a situation
arose that demanded Mrs. HM’s attention.
“You
old lady!”
Let
the record show that this invective was not hurled at Mrs. Hillbilly Mom. It
was a discussion between two dudes, who are friends, but cut each other no slack. Mrs. Hillbilly Mom could not resist
inserting herself into the conversation.
“Hey, that’s enough. I am highly offended by
that remark!”
“Huh?
I just called him an old lady. That’s not bad. He’s an old lady. He carries a
TISSUE in his pocket.”
“As spokesman for all old ladies everywhere,
I am offended! I say it is time for people to stop using our name to refer to
things they find to be not-cool.”
“Oh.
Okay. I apologize.”
“I’m not really mad! I’m just acting like
everybody who gets outraged over the least little thing. Just because he
carries a tissue does not mean he’s an old lady. You act like he’s carrying an
embroidered handkerchief.”
“Yeah,
well…dudes don’t carry tissues. Turn in your dude card.”
I
guess there’s an unofficial competition to see who’s the dudiest. I plan to enter the unofficial competition to see who's the outragediest.
2 comments:
Now, if that kid carries one of those accordian-folded plastic rainbonnets in his pocket--all pleated inside a plastic carrying-pouch...he IS an old lady.
Sioux,
Well said, Madam. Well said.
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