Monday, September 4, 2017

Bev'll Spin The Details

Here's an update on Farmer H's handyman work.

Yesterday, as you recall, he went to see Bev, our over-the-creek neighbor, about some lights that she wanted installed. He agreed to do the job for $50. Today, he went over to take some measurements. Of the lighting requirements, of course! Not of Bev! She's a married woman.

Anyhoo...Farmer H came back, just as I was getting my morning going, and said, "I'm about ready to tell Bev to forget it!"

"Now what? You already said you'd do it. And she agreed on your price."

"Well, I got over there, and she said, 'Look what he's done now.' Crazy Stick Dude. She pointed over to his land, and said, 'He's put up that tower.' Okay. He DID put up a tower. But Bev said, 'I don't know what kind of signal he's sending out, but I can feel it. I don't know what he's trying to do to me.' Oh, I'll put in her lights. But I'm afraid she'll say they give off some frequency, and that it's my fault. That I did something to them."

"You know, there are people sensitive to stuff like that. I knew a girl who could tell when she went by a house if they had their TV on. She said she could feel it."

"Yeah, there's thousands of frequencies out there. But that don't mean Crazy Stick Dude is sending out signals on purpose to get Bev."

"He probably just built a tower to drive her crazy."

"Well, it's working. She's as nutty as you."

I haven't met Bev yet. But I'm thinking...if I start chewing gum, and save those little foil wrappers...now that I'm retired...I might just be able to make her a protective suit for Christmas. Or the holidays. Whatever she celebrates.

6 comments:

Sioux Roslawski said...

HM--Farmer H said that Bev is "as nutty as you" and you let that go?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
I actually took that as a COMPLIMENT! Because Bev understands some of my pet conspiracy theories, while Farmer H is as in the dark and feeding on bullcrap as a mushroom. Of course, there IS a limit on craziness, and Bev seems to be near the "FULL" mark, while Crazy Stick Dude is overflowing.

fishducky said...

You have an "as nutty as you" gauge?

Hillbilly Mom said...

fishducky,
It takes all manner of instruments to navigate life with Farmer H.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

Nutty just means creative, right?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Kathy,
Yes. Of course! I'm sure that's what Farmer H meant...