Monday, November 13, 2017

Was There Something In The Air That Night?

Whew! I have a headache that's been kicking my butt all day.

I figured it would arrive last night, after Farmer H and I spent a couple hours at the casino. The smoke was thicker than Heinz Ketchup in there! The last two times we've been to the casino, I came down with a headache that evening, which lasted about 24 hours. It has to be the smoke. Unless Burger Brothers is putting MSG in their burgers.

I'm sure that headache couldn't be from riding in the car with Farmer H for an hour each way. Though now that I think about it, I DO get a headache when we drive to Oklahoma to visit The Pony. Maybe it's the dry air lately, with this cold snap, and the electric furnace running more, drying out the Mansion. Maybe the feds have been flying over the Mansion, filling the atmosphere with contrails designed to make Mrs. HM's sinuses ache. I'll have to ask Farmer H to ask his new best friend Bev for her opinion.

He was over there today, working on her electromagnet machines that ward off evil spirits. Farmer H said she even offered to send me a stick with contrail information on it, but he refused! First of all, I had to ask what kind of stick. Was it engraved? Notches recording days of spray? What in the Not-Heaven was this "stick?" When Farmer H roundaboutly revealed it as a flash drive, I said NO THANK YOU! As you may recall, my internet went down the very next morning after Bev's husband invited himself in to use my internet to download something to his laptop.

So hard is this headache kicking my butt that it might be drafted by the NFL. Maybe it's an altruistic sort, and could spent its time helping alcoholics and drug addicts relieve themselves of their respective habits.

I feel like I might need protective gear to deal with this headache. It hurts so much that the back of my neck is on fire, right down to the area between my shoulders. Those muscles feel like a loaded slingshot, stretched back as far as it will go. I hope they don't snap. My flying head could severely injure someone.

Right now, after today's blood pressure pill, an acetaminophen, about 36 oz of Diet Coke, lunch, and several Life Saver Wint-O-Green mints...the headache has dialed back a notch. Now it's more like a toddler kicking the back of my airplane seat.

After supper, I might retire (RETIRE!) to my OPC (Old People Chair) with my vibrator. I'm not talkin' about my OPC's built-in vibrator, by cracky!

I'm talking about that hand-held plastic vibrator that I use on my sinuses.

5 comments:

Sioux Roslawski said...

HM (or should I call you Fernando?)--

I hope you feel better soon. Headaches are a pain... in the head.

River said...

I'd say the problem is definitely the smoke and you should probably start wearing a bandit style face mask or switch to a place that doesn't allow smoking.
There's a vibrator for sinuses?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
I was counting on you to recognize FERNANDO! That headache is like the Timex watch of headaches. It stays a-kickin', and keeps on tickin' me off! Now after more caffeine, an aspirin, and an ibuprofen...plus some more vibrator therapy, it's still going strong. Not vomity, lose-consciousness strong. But strong enough to keep me off my conspiracy websites tonight.

***
River,
Even the non-smoking section of the casino is filled with smoke! Maybe a face mask would keep the crazy weirdos away from me. There's a story about one coming up on the weekend. A weirdo. Not a mask. Probably on my other blog.

There's a little vibrator that looks like a hollow ring with four ball-shaped feet. I know that description doesn't do it justice. If I think of it, I may get a picture for tomorrow. It's not specifically for sinuses. I don't want to think about what it may be specifically for! But I use it for my sinuses.

Sioux Roslawski said...

HM--That's because ABBA is a band I enjoy. Have you seen the movie "Muriel's Wedding"? Toni Collette. ABBA music. Some funny scenes. Some uplifting scenes, all wrapped up in Australian accents...

River said...

@Sioux; that's a great movie, one of my favourites that I watch at least once a year.