Farmer H was home on Wednesday when I left for town. As I was on my way out the door, he said he was going to take a bath (in the big triangle tub in the master bathroom).
"Oh. Thanks for telling me now. I could have moved my stuff."
That's the thing. Farmer H is usually not home. I leave my Mansion clothes draped over the edge of the tub, to put on when I return. When he takes a bath, he has to remove everything from the side of the tub. Not sure why. Does he splash a lot? There's plenty of other frontage for him to climb over.
Anyhoo... when I got home, I made Farmer H his Wild Turkey drink, and gave him a snack. I went to change clothes as usual. The routine includes taking a pee after my town trip. Once I was ensconced on the throne, I noticed that the roll of toilet paper was missing. We have a holder on the wall across from the toilet. It's inconvenient for me. It's not a hardship to lean over and grab it, but I have to wrestle with tearing off the three squares I desire. And when I get out of the shower, my arm drips water on a couple squares on the top of the roll. So I prefer to take my TP from the roll I leave sitting on the edge of the tub, at my left elbow while I'm upon the throne.
Huh. WHERE did Farmer H leave it? I couldn't see it anywhere. I saw that my clothes were back on the edge of the tub. But I didn't see my Ace Bandage wrap that I put on my knee when I get home. It makes it feel better. I leave it on until I have a shower and go to town. But now it was not on the side of the tub by the faucet handles where I had left it.
By contorting my neck, I saw the Ace Bandage over my left shoulder, on the back of the toilet. By reaching my left arm waaayyyy back, I felt the roll of toilet paper, which was located on the back of the toilet between my shoulder blades. After re-dressing myself, I informed Farmer H that I did not appreciate the moving of my stuff.
"You could at least put things back where they were!"
"Your clothes were there!"
"Yeah. But I couldn't find the toilet paper. And my wrap was not where I left it."
"You should have looked when you went in there, and seen the toilet paper was not on the edge of the tub. Then you could have seen where it was."
"I was in a hurry! I was not looking for the toilet paper, which I assumed was where it was supposed to be. Are you saying YOU look for it every time you go in the bathroom?"
"Yes."
Sweet Gummi Mary! Farmer H is so full of lies! And now he was blaming the victim! I guess I'm supposed to have eyes in the back of my head to find where he has put my stuff. Or be psychic.
I wonder what Farmer H would do if I hid the toilet paper... He is too lazy to replace the cardboard roll with three squares still clinging, that is on the holder across from the toilet.
4 comments:
Fair enough to expect the toilet paper to be where you left it, but (there's always a but) when walking towards the toilet did you not notice the roll sitting on top of the tank? Not the best place for it unless one is a contortionist, but we aren't are we? My roll hangs on the wall right nest to the toilet, so close that if I use a double length roll it bumps my elbow. Really handy for short people.
River,
No, why would I notice that? I'm usually looking at the octagon window above the toilet, judging if the sun is out, or more rain might be coming. I expect things to remain where I left them, and not jump from tub-side to toilet-back!
The rolls in the boys bathroom I use most of the time, and in the NASCAR bathroom in the basement, are next to the toilet. The shape of our master bathroom puts the shower on my right elbow, and the big triangle tub on my left elbow. So no wall there to hang it, except for opposite the toilet.
You could totally confuse him by getting a free standing toilet paper dispenser! I had to get one, because the dispenser was cut into the wall and would not hold the double rolls until they were used enough to bring the size of the roll down. HeWho does not seem to know how to take the empty cardboard tube off and replace it with a fresh roll. Besides you know as well as I do that if we want something done right, we must do it ourselves!!
Kathy,
That would punish myself too much. There really isn't room in there for the stand-alone. I hate them! We have them at the casino hotel rooms. I feel like they are going to tip over. Farmer H has refused to replace the roll that's on the wall opposite the toilet. It has about three squares left. I'm the one who always replaced it, even though I used the roll sitting on the edge of the tub. I've been waiting to see how long it takes him. Over a year now, and counting.
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