I've been holding out on you. For two weeks, I've kept a saucy little secret. Hope you didn't eat fish during those two weeks. I don't like to think of the deprivation that I was responsible for. I could easily have shared my saucy little secret. Turns out I'm not as much a giver as I pretend!
I KNOW HOW TO MAKE MY OWN TARTAR SAUCE!
Oh, please. Don't tell me that you've known how to do that since you were knee-high to a grasshopper. Let me have my glory. You can share your recipe for something complicated, with many steps, exotic ingredients, and perhaps a foam infusion, or a puffy texture. A marinade that requires seven days of soaking, at 38.3 degrees Fahrenheit. An entree that could kill you if not prepared properly, like the puffer fish. I won't be jealous! Just give me my tartar sauce glory.
The whole discovery came about because I had planned to have fish for supper, but the tartar sauce in the pantry had an expiration date ending in -18. Sorry. I may be my mother's daughter, but I don't care to join her just yet! I might eat a two-years-past dry food, but not a mayo-based product.
I perused the innernets on New Delly before I ascended to the kitchen. I found a good recipe. Good, because it was simple, and I had the ingredients waiting for me upstairs. Even so, I did not follow the instructions precisely. Here's my version.
mayonnaise..................1 cup
Worcestershire sauce....a dash or two
sugar............................a pinch or two
salt...............................a small shake
black pepper.................a small shake
dill pickle, minced.........2 tablespoons
onion, minced...............2 tablespoons
THAT'S IT!
It's better after sitting for six hours or so. Best a day later. The original recipe said it would keep for two weeks in your FRIG II. You can vary it to suit your tastes. I like a chunky tartar sauce. If you like it smooth, cut out some pickle and onion. In that case, you might want to add dill pickle juice. Not too much, or your tartar sauce will be runny! But maybe you like it that way.
This tartar sauce is seriously delicious! I could sell it in jars on the counter of my proposed handbasket factory (in the winter, so it doesn't get rancid in the heat), with my picture on the label! Like the leprechaun says Lucky Charms are "Magically delicious!" I could say "Seriously delicious!" While giving my teacher stinkeye!
If you don't eat fish and tartar sauce... never mind. Your secret is safe with mine.
4 comments:
I thought Farmer H regularly unveils his meat. The tighty-whiteys get dropped on the floor, and into Poolio he goes. (Is that why Juno hides in her doghouse?)
Tartar sauce? I've made a variety of mayonnaise-based sauces, but never that. However, I'm not much of a tartar sauce type of person. (Ketchup on fish is what I prefer.)
But. perhaps I might like it if I made it myself and could add a little extra of this or a little extra of that.
Perhaps you've launched me into a new adventure...
Sioux,
Juno and The Pony both have PTSD over Farmer H's tighteee-whiteees! Which reminds me of another instance that triggered The Pony today! Maybe I'll remember to write about it...
Well, Madam, I suppose you are a Ketchupton like The Pony is a Butterton. I used to make a honey mustard sauce for Genius using a little mayo. And I made a great cocktail sauce with ketchup and horseradish. I've been out of the sauce business for years. But I gotta say, THIS TARTAR SAUCE IS INCREDIBLE! Definitely not breathtaking.
I eat fish, but mostly canned tuna or canned herrings on lightly toasted bread. The tuna gets mixed with a little mayo and finely chopped dill pickle, but the herrings are in their own tomato sauce, so that's good enough for me. If I'm eating real fish fillets like from a fish'n'chip shop, then I just squeeze a little lemon juice on them. I'm not a fan of tartar sauce.
River,
I guess I'll have to scratch you off the proposed buyers of the jars of my homemade tartar sauce on the counter of my proposed handbasket factory!
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