FH, Phone Broke

Not so much BROKE, as malfunctioning. Nothing cracked, dented, shattered, or scratched. You may recall that Farmer H has a NEW phone. He thinks he's had it less than 30 days. He thinks that, because he hopes it can be fixed or replaced for free. I've grown testy (heh, heh, I said TESTY) with Farmer H's phone antics. You'd think a grown man could take care of a phone long enough to get our money's worth out of it. But I'm getting ahead of myself...

 

Thursday, our voting day, I climbed into A-Cad when Farmer H and The Pony picked me up after my nurse practitioner appointment. Neither was very talky. Almost as if they were in cahoots in a conspiracy they were keeping from me. The Pony had his head down, and Farmer H wasn't distracted by his precious phone while driving us to the county voting center over by the morgue.

 

With an ominous statement from the back seat, I realized that The Pony was fiddling with Farmer H's cell phone! Of course Farmer H had already made it malfunction. He's barely had it 30 days, we think. Somehow, his notification sounds didn't work anymore.

 

The Pony lamented that he'd tried everything. I guess he had a pleasant hour in the car with Farmer H, while I was cooling my heels in the VIRUSy hospital clinic! He'd searched the innernets for a solution, tried several, and couldn't fix the notifications.

 

"It says that the problem is most likely a new app. That if the sounds work in SAFE MODE, that must be it. They do. But then they won't work when I take it out of safe mode."

 

"Well, it's been doing that for a few days now. I wondered why nobody was texting me. Then my buddies said they did, and I found them, but I never heard them. At least the phone rings if somebody calls me. Did you try to text me?"

 

"Yes. And...nothing."

 

"They've been taking a while to come in, too."

 

"What apps have you gotten recently?"

 

"None. I don't do apps."

 

"Let me look and see the most recent ones."

 

"Alls I know is that I had to agree to Google Chrome when I did my doctor appointment call on Monday."

 

"That's not an app, Dad. Chrome has always been there."

 

"Well, it made me agree to something for it to install."

 

"Not it. What apps do you use?"

 

"I tried to put you guys in a group, so you'd be at the top of my contacts. Oh, I did notice that the Casey's app updated itself. I never did nothin' to it. But it's different."

 

"That group thing wouldn't do it. Okay. I see the Casey's app. It's the most recent one. It updated yesterday. Maybe I can uninstall it, and install it again."

 

"I've got to have my Casey's app!"

 

"I don't know what else to do. You can't get a sound notification. I can't even PLAY the choices of sounds, unless I start your phone in safe mode. And you don't want to use it all the time in safe mode. Here, Mom. Put it up there where Dad can reach it if he needs it."

 

"Do you want to stop by the SPRINT store before we go to the casino? We're right here in town."

 

"NO! Them idiots in there don't know nothin'! They never help me. I might try the store where I bought it, on Tuesday, when I take [his cancer girlfriend] to her appointment."

 

"Are you sure it isn't Google Chrome?"

 

"No, Mom. Chrome is part of the phone. It has always been on it, even if Dad didn't use it."

 

"Well, you said it hasn't worked for a few days. So if the Casey's app only updated yesterday, you had the problem before then. All I can think of is when you opened Google Chrome to take that doctor call." 

"I didn't even hear it ring. Good thing I was looking at it, waiting for the call. It gave me directions. I punched in exactly what it told me to do. It was easier than I thought it would be."

"Maybe it overrode something so you didn't get interrupted during that call."

"Huh. There has to be something on there that's overriding the notification sounds. Hand me Dad's phone again. Do you mind if I close out your tabs, Dad?"

"I don't have no tabs open."

"Yes you do. There's that thing from the doctor call, and three tabs about guns you've looked up."

"Okay. I don't care. I can look them up again."

"HEY! Hear that? Now the notifications are working!"

"YOU'RE WELCOME! Because I kind of feel like I solved that problem, even though I have no idea how any of it works."

"Yeah. Well. I guess it was that doctor appointment tab that was keeping the sounds off. Everything looks normal now."

The Pony need to realize that most hoofbeats do not result in zebras, but rather in... um... a pony.