Hey! Remember when we were always next in line at The Devil's Playground? Well, we're not anymore.
I almost was. A lady had just disgorged her cart of an overflowing upside-down pyramid of goods. I was right behind her when I noticed that my personal minion, my little Pony, had gathered the bread, the PB&J combo jar, and the loaf of white bread for the #1 son to take back to College, but had neglected to fetch this week's sugar-free cookie collection for Farmer H. I had to pull out of line! And proceed halfway across the Playground using my cart as a walker in order to procure those cookies. It doesn't pay to leave off the one item requested by Farmer H.
When I returned, another bloated cart had taken my place. This pusher could not unload her trolley because the first gal was still jawing with the Devil's Handmaiden. I stepped out of line to seek a more HM-friendly aisle. No dice. The best I could do was next to next to next-in-line. So I wheeled back, with my ample tail unable to tuck between my legs.
The problem seem to lie with the Devil's Handmaiden's perception that some of the bazillion items just rung up were not foodstuffs. Apparently, the Hold-Up Gal wanted to pay with some kind of benefits. I was away for five minutes or so, and don't know the exact nature of the drama. I'm not the kind of gal to look in someone's cart to see what she's buying. Okay. I am. But that cart was way too full for a proper snoop. The manager was called, a receipt bandied about, and several forms of payment including card, long white paper thingies, and cash were exchanged. Hold-Up Gal's husband (I assume) stood behind her, jouncing a baby on his shoulder. He was not the least bit agitated. I think the baby must have inherited those genes. He was a mellow little thing. But here's the most astonishing part of the whole drama.
THE 20 ITEMS OR LESS HANDMAIDEN CALLED ME OVER TO HER LINE!
Yes! Booyah! I thanked her profusely for her kindness. And again when she was handing me the receipt. "You're welcome. If I hadn't, you'd still be standing there." Indeed. The line had not moved at all. The rule-following Devil's Handmaiden was trying to smooth things over with the excited Hold-Up Gal.
"Sorry for your inconvenience. Now you have enough left on there to go over to Subway for a sandwich."
Something tells me that was not quite the right thing to say.