Friday, July 6, 2018

(the possibility of) Love Hurts

Perhaps I have mentioned that The Pony is not the most conscientious of housekeepers. So you can imagine my surprise when I got a text from him that said,

"You'll be sad to know I hurt myself while cleaning today! I was on the ground sorting my laundry when I bashed my hip on the bed frame corner. Sending two pictures. The injury, and the perpetrator. It was bleeding in three distinct spots earlier, but not much. It's my belly flab, right above the hip."

"NOO O O! I don't have the pictures yet, but I'm sorry you were injured. Hard to believe you were cleaning, though. Be careful, you don't have the new insurance card yet."

"YOW! That's a maiming contraption! The only thing worse would be if it was out in the sun, and seared a brand on you as well. Was this your Once-a-Two-Year Cleaning, Whether My Apartment Needs it Or Not."

"It was "I might have a date coming up next week" cleaning, but you shan't get any more details."

"Well, it seems a bit PRESUMPTUOUS to be cleaning the BEDROOM..."

"It's better than cleaning my CAR, which you once implied."

"Mayhap it is, mayhap it ain't..."

Let the record show that I am not trying to embarrass The Pony. He DID say he was folding laundry when the injury happened. And I did not show you the picture of his soft underbelly with three puncture wounds. He emphasized that he has no formal plans, just a possibility of a get-together.

What's going to become of our little Pony, in a world so fraught with danger?


Sioux Roslawski said...

Nooooo! I've only met The Pony once, but to imagine him old enough and mature enough to... well, you know... makes me shudder.

Say it ain't so.

River said...

Perhaps remind The Pony that laundry can be sorted on the bed or on the table or anywhere else that isn't the floor. Or even on the floor but far away from that nasty out-to-get-him bed frame.

Hillbilly Mom said...

I KNOW!!! Sometimes I have to tell him, "TMI, TMI!"

And the whole car thing was because back when he first had a girlfriend, I told him to clean out his car, because IT WAS A TRASHY MESS, and I wanted him to make a good impression when he picked her up. I didn't mean for THAT!

Having seen his apartment AFTER he said he cleaned for us...I'm pretty sure his only table (a coffee table) was covered with books and assorted coins and probably dishes, because his kitchen counter would have been covered with other junk.

Maybe he was sorting through dirty laundry that had been piled on the floor, in order to wash clothes. In that case, I would not have wanted it on the bed! And if he was sorting through the clean laundry to fold it, THAT SHOULDN'T BE ON THE FLOOR!

So many unanswered questions that I don't want to ask!

fishducky said...

Our little Pony is growing up!! Do you think he'll ever be a Stallion?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Physically, yes. As far as the mindset...probably not.