Saturday, October 28, 2023

The Pony Learns The Hard Way That Farmer H's Safe Advice Is Not Actually Safe

As the remodeler of The Pony's house, Farmer H advised him of the best location to put his safe. The Pony likes to keep some cash on hand, even though he most often uses plastic for daily expenditures.

When I stopped by to pick up a check for The Pony's half of our flip house expenditures, The Pony revealed that he had a problem. He was paying cash for his portion of the air conditioning unit. Upon opening his hidden safe, he was unpleasantly surprised.

"I'm not listening to Dad any more. He told me that was the best place to hide my safe. But when I opened it, my money was all moist! Moldy. Mildewed. I'm trying to dry it out. I'm going to put my safe somewhere else!"

The money he gave me looked okay. I guess it was the best of the soggy bills.

Farmer H says that The Pony should microwave the bills. I said he should put them in sunlight, though that could be problematic.

"I guess I could lay them out on my kitchen floor, where the sun comes in every morning..."

"Probably not a good idea! Dad and Old Buddy might come barging in while you're at work, and tromp all over them."

I think the best idea is for The Pony to deposit that money in the bank, and then draw it out again the next week, if he still wants to keep some cash on hand. 

Yeah. That's the best way for The Pony to launder his money.

4 comments:

River said...

Isuggest layering the bills between sheets of paper towel, that will dry them out then when the paper towel dries he can still use it. Who puts a safe where moisture can get in? I have a safe too and it is in a very dry spot plus anything in there is in plastic bags so nothing can get wet. It is fireproof too so that's where important documents are kept.

Hillbilly Mom said...

River,
I believe Farmer H THOUGHT this was a dry spot, and didn't expect the moisture there to fluctuate. I'm pretty sure The Pony's safe is fireproof.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

So, I guess Farmer H would laugh at me putting cash in my freezer? And teapots? I had enough cold hard cash on hand to purchase our home here. The look on the face of the man who was clueless as to how much cash his wife had squirreled away was priceless! Who knows how much junk the man would have wasted my money on? Like the dump truck with no brakes ....

Hillbilly Mom said...

Kathy,
I think my grandma used to put money in the freezer. I stash it in a locked bag (to keep Farmer H fingers out of it) in one of our basement safes. But I DO sock away cash every week. It's good to have on hand. Now that Farmer H has such a booming business, he's less likely to pilfer our money for his mechanical gadgets.