Sunday, October 14, 2012

I'm Sure There's A Perfectly Conspiratorial Explanation

Last night, we had some excitement around the Mansion.

Perhaps I should say OVER the Mansion. The #1 son and his overnight guest were chillin' in his room about 9:45, when up over the roof there arose such a clatter, they ran out the front door to see what was the matter. A helicopter buzzed the Mansion. It was treetop height, according to the boys, and shining a beacon. They reported that the beacon did not splash across the ground, but shot out in front. This helicopter came from the nowhere side of Hillmomba, over the Mansion, and headed toward town.

They tromped down the stairs and broke the no-trespass zone into my office. My ire was quelled by their animated demeanor. "There's a helicopter outside! Right over the house! No higher than the treetops! What is going on?" Because, you see, I would know. What with me sitting in my dark basement office, blogging, oblivious to the goings-on in our air space. I told them I, the mushroom, biding my time in the dark while being fed crap, did not have a clue. They went back upstairs to research the matter on their own.

Around 10:15, I heard them stampede outside again. The Pony trotted after them, the miniature version of their Clydesdaleness. I hustled up the stairs in my slow-motion manner and stepped onto the porch. The boys were out in the field. If they'd been turkeys, and the still-to-come downpour was already occurring, they would have drowned from the deluge that would have poured into their open mouths.

I heard it. A helicopter. It was coming from town. The boys shouted that they could see the light over in the barn field. Then it appeared. Treetop level. It came from the BARn side, and passed over the house. I could see three colored lights on the bottom, but no beacon. Farmer H arrived home from the auction. He also gazed skyward. He reported that there were no auto accidents between town and the Mansion. We sometimes have the Life Flight helicopter pass over on the way from a nearby trauma center to the city.

Then I heard another. This one was in the direction of town. It never flew over, but we could hear it. Fairly close. I know the sky was overcast. So the  cloud ceiling would keep helicopters low, perhaps. And the storm might have been aloft already. Winds were gusty. A night fit for neither man nor beast nor helicopter. I have no idea what was going on. We live about four miles from a Level 5 maximum security correctional center. I presume the aerial activity had something to do with that facility. I saw nothing on the local news channels. Nothing on the website for The Daily Hillmomban.

If anybody has a clue, fill me in.


knancy said...

Might be worth your time to check/walk/drive over your property to make sure there are no pot growers or meth makers usurping your acres.

Sioux said...

I heard they were looking for a one-armed man...

Hillbilly Mom said...

That is sound advice. However, Farmer H regularly patrols our 20 contiguous acres here at the Mansion. The 10 acres up on the hill are sorely lacking Farmer H's attention, ever since that time the guy next to it threatened to shoot him, and Farmer H called the sheriff, and Neighbor had to pay $6000 in court fees.

Hey! Maybe I could write a screenplay!

Kathy's Klothesline said...

Life flight helicopters fly low. I had one land here in our open field in the front. I was minding my own business, bathing my Saint Bernard, who happened to be terrified of storms and loud noises. I was afraid it was a tornado and the dog and I were clinging to each other. When the roof did not come off, I ventured out in my sopping wet clothes to see what was happening. "Ma'am, just go back inside now and mind your own business", said the volunteer fireman with only half of his teeth. It took some doing to make him understand that he was conducting business on my property and blocking the main road to the full hook-up sites (Bullfrog Blvd). I didn't mind that they were making use of my field, but they could have warned me first!

Hillbilly Mom said...

Don't get me started! How dare he tell you to mind your own business ON YOU OWN PROPTERTY!

What could they have been doing that required them to set down in your field? I smell a conspiracy! Or maybe just a bathroom break for the helicopter crew.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

It was a life flight for a wreck on the interstate. I am located just east of a serious incline that get lots of wrecks. I didn't mind the use of the field, just could not understand the need for 2 fire engines and all the local law enforcement vehicles. They parked willy nilly as they waited for an ambulance to transport the patient to the copter. You would have thought that at least one of the over a dozen useless standers-by could have walked up to my office and announced their intent .... or maybe even have gotten my permission? Common courtesy is lacking in these parts!

Hillbilly Mom said...

At least they had a legitimate reason. Though it might have been nice to receive notification rather than a MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.