I Have Suspicions That My Boycott Went Unnoticed

I used to frequently pick up a Dairy Queen treat on my way home from town. It often turned out to be my supper when I didn't like what I was feeding Farmer H. But sometimes it passed for a late lunch, which I usually skip. It was not a sweet treat, but the pretzel sticks and a cheeseburger from the 2-for-$5 menu.

Back in mid-June, there must have been a new hire, or a disgruntled veteran, or new machinery. Three times in a row, my pretzel sticks were BURNT! So burnt that you could smell the burniness on them once the bag was in the car. Indeed, once I got them home and took a look, they were a very dark brown. In protest, I withheld my business from Dairy Queen. In fact, I didn't go back until July 17, and yesterday. I figured that would give time for a new hire to be trained or fired, or a veteran to become re-gruntled, or new machinery to be broken in or its idiosyncrasies learned.

The pretzels sticks are not quite as burnt. Only one side now, instead of the whole outer coating. There is a problem, however, with the bagging. Sometimes they stuff both items into a small bag, with the cheeseburger on the bottom, and the pretzel sticks on top. That makes for a top-heavy bag that wants to turn itself over at any stop or curve. But it doesn't mess up the food inside if I brace it against the seat with my purse, Percy.

The other way of bagging is better, if attention is paid to how the items are placed in the larger bag. The cheeseburger should be FLAT, not on its side! That makes the cheese run off on the ride home. There is room in the larger bag for the items to be side by side. The worst bagging is when the pretzel sticks are placed on the bottom of the bag, with the cheeseburger on top of them! That knocks off the salt, and bends the pretzels, and makes them soggy from their own steam.

Anyhoo... when I got home with Wednesday's supper in the larger bag, I found my cheeseburger on its side for no reason other than to irritate me. The pretzel sticks were poking out of their cardboard dish all willy-nilly, and their queso sauce container was on its side. They're not succeeding at wooing me back!

Also, they included SIX NAPKINS! Who does that? Obviously, this food is not being shared among six people. It's wasteful. And look at the way they put in the napkins!

What in the NOT-HEAVEN! It looks like they've already been used! Though closer inspection revealed that they had not, but were merely wadded-up and shoved in, forming a pattern like a rose injected with LSD, or a bird's nest for some freaky loony-bird. Two napkins would suffice, folded in half like they come out of the dispenser or the package.

I may punish DQ a few more days for their insouciance, playing fast and loose with my affections and my purchase. I dare not complain face-to-face at the drive-thru window, since they know my order and my voice. Unknown atrocities could be bestowed upon my food. Much worse than uncheesed burgers, burnt and bent pretzel sticks, and crumpled napkins...