Payback Is A Sitch

Sweet Gummi Mary! Such a fortuitous situation was dropped into my non-lap that I can scarcely contain my glee! 

 

The stars aligned, Even Steven opened up his day planner, a TV station took a payoff, and the perfect storm arrived as The Pony was cooking his daily meal on Wednesday. You might recall that only the day before, The Pony had cast aspersions upon the intentions of one Mrs. Hillbilly Mom when she dared to describe a building recently beset by fire as a white church. Even though a drive past it showed a structure covered with white siding.

I guarandarntee you, my cold revenge was a dish much sweeter than the hot battered fish and garlic toast that The Pony served himself for lupper. He was sitting on the long couch, tapping on his laptop, watching American Dad while waiting for his food to heat up. I sat down on the short couch for a minute, before descending to my lair for my own lunch.

I don't watch American Dad unless The Pony has it on. But I looked up the episode [Brains, Brains and Automobiles] after the fact. Just in case you want to after-the-fact-check me.

Anyhoo... this sweet reprisal could not have been more welcome if it had arrived on my doorstep, wrapped up in a dog-proof box, and tied with a big red bow. On the TV screen, a crocodile/alligator walked out of the water towards American Dad. He (the critter not the dad) was wearing a pink floppy hat with a feather, and a vest, and a neck scarf. 

"OH MY GOSH! How is this NOT RAYYYYYCIST?"

"Mom. Heh, heh. He's a Chocodile..."

"That's even worse! How can you say that about a green alligator/crocodile? Are you implying that he's BLACK? Because he seems to be dressed like a pimp?"

"No! No, Mom. He is literally the mascot for Hostess Chocodiles!"

"I've had a Chocodile. I don't recall them pimping it out with a cartoon character. And WHY? Just because it's dark on the outside?"

"It's just using a crocodile for a chocolate-covered Twinkie. Chocodile/crocodile."

"I sure hope your phone isn't listening to you! You'll NEVER be able to get a job! Did you see the other day when a lady lost her job for something she said when she was 14? They will find it! That's how it is these days! Always about race, always about dividing."

I don't know if The Pony got my point. For a nanosecond, I thought I saw panic dash across his face when I called him out for Chocodiling. No harm intended on his part. But less innocent than my description of the outside of a worship-house.

Sometimes, a delicious chocolate-enrobed snack cake is just a delicious chocolate-enrobed snack cake. Even though Hostess has done away with the mascot.

 

Here is a Chauncey Chocodile picture from American Dad.

Here is a Chauncey Chocodile commercial that I'd never seen. [30 seconds]

Here is a video of Kramer being mistaken for a pimp. [2 minutes]

 

Because I loved Seinfeld, and it just goes to show that sometimes, a man with a cane and a flamboyant coat and a floppy hat is just a man with a cane and a flamboyant coat and a floppy hat.