Whoopsie! I did it again. I played with her mind, and she got lost in the blame. Yes, the Woman Owner of the Gas Station Chicken Store was mighty confused when I walked out the door on Sunday. She was pretty hard on herself. You know, what with running this business over 30 years, and being the one to train a whole small-town population of cashiers over that time. But I must take some responsibility.
Man Owner was busy helping a teenage kid who was paying for his mom's gas. He couldn't work the chip card. Then he didn't know the security number it asked for. So he had to run back outside to ask her. Man Owner was telling Woman Owner that he remembered when the kid was THIS HIGH, but couldn't remember his mom's name. Woman Owner told him. She was stepping behind him to scan my winning scratchers, since she'd offered to help me at the left register while Man Owner was busy.
She asked how I was, and I said, "Great, but I hate this wind. I can hardly keep my shirt from blowing up over my head. I wish I knew who ordered this wind!"
Man Owner: "Ha ha. We have a shipment of KITES coming in tomorrow..."
I knew he didn't. But it was pretty funny. Woman Owner showed me my receipt stapled to the winning scratchers. I had $55. I knew that going in. I planned to spend $25. That being $24 of it on scratchers, and $1 on my magical elixir, plus I'd give her the 69 cents for the soda. That would give me $30 in change. I like to make it come out even.
Woman Owner tore off my tickets, and punched them into the register, saying the amount of each, then laying it in front of me as she did so. That's how she trains her staff. I told her I had my 69 cents exact change, and she giggled.
"Oh, GOOD! Because I was really confused when you didn't have it the other day, heh, heh."
"I KNOW! So was I!"
"Okay. That'll be $61.78."
"Um. Are you sure? Because shouldn't it be 69 cents? Not 78? It's always $1.69 for my soda." [I was so fixated on that exact change that the enormity of me owing $61 didn't even register in my brain.]
"Oh. What did I do?"
"Did you ring up a 32 oz? Or smaller?"
"No. It shows here (she pulled out the register tape) I rang up a 44 oz."
"That doesn't seem right..."
"Let me look. OH! Silly me! I forgot to clear the gas purchase I had on here! I'll have to deal with that after you leave. I'm sorry. Here! You get $50 back."
"Uh. I don't think so! I only gave you $55 of winners!"
"Oh my. WHAT have I done? Let's see... you should owe me $25.69. Take off the $55. So I own you $30 back! I'm terrible today!"
"No. I confused you talking about the wind."
"No. It's totally my fault.
"Oh, no! You might need Man Owner to show you how to do it!" [He's notorious for messing things up, and being really slow.]
"I hope not!"
"I think you need to go lay down for a while!"
"YES! That's just what I need. Thank you for suggesting that? Did you hear her? I need to go lay down for a while."
Man Owner looked perplexed for a minute, until he realized she was kidding.
I really need to keep my mouth shut when I go in there. Before they deny me my magical elixir. Like a certain New York SOUP STAND PROPRIETOR on a show about nothing...
3 comments:
Yeah. If they said, "No soda for you!" chances are you would not find an armoire on the street, full of recipes for soda...
I know how she feels. I got discombobulated when my niece came through my register and I didn't even recognise her, she got to talking then asked for $40 cash out and I forgot to give it to her, so she had to wait while I served the next customer to get her $40 when the drawer opened again. We aren't allowed to open it between customers, without calling over a supervisor.
Sioux,
Yes. I'm as sure of that as I am that I will never spend a night sleeping the drawer of a Farbman dresser.
***
River,
Farmer H does that to me, when I'm just standing in the kitchen washing dishes or cooking. He sits down at the table and starts talking, and I can't remember what I'm doing next. At least it doesn't involve $40!
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