Tuesday, November 23, 2021

Straight From The Pony's Mouth

I hate it when I'm bested by The Pony. He is so droll with his comebacks. I want to exclaim, "DOH!" like Homer Simpson, when The Pony zings me.

Country Mart employees probably gossip about me in their break room. Which is a bench in front of the store. I'll have to tune a recently-healed ear on their conversation, to see if they have labeled me their most profitable alcoholic. It seems like every recent trip I've made there has involved an alcohol purchase.

I picked up some wine for The Pony to have on his next scheduled day off eve. He didn't have time (nor leg strength) to get if for himself as usual at the Devil's Playground. I replenished Farmer H's Wild Turkey. I picked up two more bottles of wine for The Pony to have at Thanksgiving and his next day off. AND I have rum on the list (and of course limes) for my next trip, in case he fancies a rum and Coke instead of wine at the dinner table.

Anyhoo... getting back to that wine. When I bought the two bottles of wine, the cashier actually put each one in a long thin paper sack favored by skid-row surreptitious sippers, and then into a plastic bag suitable for looping over an arm to carry into one's Mansion from the rear of T-Hoe. 

As I transferred the groceries from porch to kitchen, I put the two bottles of wine on the kitchen table by my laptop HIPPIE. I knew they didn't have to be refrigerated yet. Because I'm cautious, I laid them on their sides. They didn't want to stand right with a paper sack and plastic bag under their base.

When talking to The Pony later (much later) when he got home around 8:30, I said,

"Oh, I picked up your wine. You might want to take them out of the bags and set them up, since right now they're laying down by my laptop."

"Um. You DO know how wine is stored, right?"

"Okay! Enough! It's not like I'm a wine drinker! But yes... I do see those fancy wine racks in some of those building shows."

"That's actually to keep wine against the cork, but this last kind you got doesn't have the cork, just the metal lid. So it doesn't really matter. It won't hurt anything."

I hate to be schooled in the ways of alcohol by The Pony.

4 comments:

River said...

Huh, Smartypants!

Hillbilly Mom said...

River,
Yep! The Pony will be smarting out the other side of his pants if I forget to pop a bottle of that wine into FRIG II for chilling before he gets home Wednesday night!

Sioux Roslawski said...

A bottle for each day off? And a bottle for the holiday?

Perhaps you need to school him. A whole bottle of wine drunk in one day?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
The Pony likes wine in the evening bath in the big triangle tub in the master bathroom on the eve of a day off. He might want it for Thanksgiving dinner, but he might want rum and Coke instead. I can't be running out to get a bottle of wine at a moment's notice. So we have a stockpile now. Which reminds me, I DO need to put one in FRIG II to chill. I'm not saying The Pony has never drank an entire bottle, but that's not the plan here. Hick will sometimes finish the dregs of a weeks old bottle of The Pony's wine.