I'm Pretty Sure Farmer H Is Trying To Make Me Kill Him

You may recall that Farmer H came home midday on Friday, sneezing and snorting, declaring he did NOT have a cold. Yet all symptoms were there. He was all nasally and bucket-head talking, but seemed to endure his illness fairly well. He bought a giant bottle of over-the-counter cough medicine that I suspect he doses himself with at bedtime. He bought a giant bag of sugar-free mentholyptus cough drops. 

I made him a hot toddy on Friday evening. He said it was too strong, even though it contained the regular amount of whiskey I always give him in a regular drink. It's his own fault he chose the small cup and didn't get it watered down enough. 

Anyhoo... I also made Farmer H a hot toddy on Saturday evening, in the big cup, and it was satisfactory. On Sunday, Farmer H came home a bit early, having shown the flip house to a looker/possible buyer. When I awoke from my hour nap, and got out of the shower, Farmer H was in the basement, kicked back in my vibrating heated recliner. When I hollered down to him, he seemed a little confused. I figured he had been napping. Then he announced that he had to pee, like a toddler might do, and I left for town.

When I got home, Farmer H was back upstairs in his own recliner. I asked if he wanted a hot toddy before supper, and he said he did. I had the hot water already poured into the honey and lemon juice, and was getting ready to add the whiskey when I noticed that the bottle was almost empty!

"Hey! Did you have a drink sometime? Because this bottle is way lower than I thought it was yesterday when I made your drink."

"Oh. I had a drink. With Diet Coke."

"You already HAD a drink today? Then why am I making you a hot toddy?"

"Because it opens up my head."

"But you already had a drink and didn't tell me! I don't want to overdose you!"

"You won't overdose me!"

"You're not on any cough medicine or Nyquil are you?"

"No. No medicine."

"Okaaaayyyy. I'll go ahead and make it. But I'm not sure you should have it."

Let the record show that Farmer H drank his hot toddy. Then ate supper. And stayed up until 9:30! He usually goes to bed around 7:30. However... the next morning, I had to wake him at 5:30, a time at which he is usually feeding the dogs and getting ready to leave the Mansion.

For a minute there, when he failed to get up, I was trying to get my story straight...