Seriously, WHAT Is Wrong With People?

Have I asked that question before? I'm pretty sure I have. And though many of you have tried to provide an answer, I don't think we have it figured out just yet.

Friday, shortly after noon, I came out of Save A Lot and climbed into T-Hoe. While I was writing the amount of the receipt in my checkbook (yes, I'm old-school like that), a black four-door sedan pulled into the handicap parking space on my right. I didn't even notice until I had T-Hoe running, in reverse, and turned to check if the coast was clear to back out. T-Hoe has no fancy-schmancy backup camera, and his beeper hasn't worked for years.

I saw the driver lady from the black car open up her door all the way. No harm, no foul. I also open T-Hoe's door all the way when I get out. She didn't hit his side. There was room. About six inches to spare. Plenty of room for comfortably throwing open a door, but not quite enough to comfortably back out without a fear of hitting that door with your T-Hoe's side mirror. So I waited.

Oh. Well. Parkstress was standing with her right shoulder to T-Hoe, facing the store, lighting a cigarette. Hmm. You can't take a cigarette into the store. Seemed wasteful to me. Because I was sure Parkstress was going to close her car door and go inside to shop. I could wait a few seconds until she closed her door.

Oh. Well. Parkstress leaned over into the car. Her torso, anyway, while her feet remained on the pavement. I figured she was getting her purse out. You want your purse with you to go into the store to shop. Not me. I just put the debit card and list into my shirt pocket. But most ladies seem to carry a purse. Only a few more seconds. I could wait. Then she'd close her door and go in.

Oh. Well. Parkstress was climbing back inside her car. I guess she was going to finish her cigarette first. Those things are expensive, according to Farmer H, who is not a smoker, but makes note of how much people are paying when he's in line to get his own addiction, Orb K hot dogs. Any second now Parkstress would pull that door closed, now that she was back inside her sedan, and I'd back out.

Oh. Well. Parkstress apparently likes to smoke her car cigarette with her door open. Even though her passenger-seat companion was gesturing toward either me and T-Hoe, or the sedan door. Just a few more seconds, and Parkstress would see how she was inconveniencing me, and close her door. Then I'd back out.

SWEET GUMMI MARY! Parkstress was simply NOT going to CLOSE HER CAR DOOR!

I couldn't wait any longer. Two cars were stopped, seeing T-Hoe's back-up lights, and waiting for me to emerge from that prime parking spot. I inched back. Hit the brakes. Inched some more. Cut the front wheels sharply. Inched back. T-Hoe's side mirror must have cleared that sedan's door by two inches or so, and I was FREE!

The car directly behind me did not pull into that spot. It was following me as I rounded the end of the row to exit. As I went down the parallel road by the parking lot, I saw that the white little SUV, which had also been waiting on me, was halfway into my just-vacated parking space. Blinker on. Waiting for Parkstress to close her door so it could get all the way in.

I figure it was going to be a long wait.