Sunday, May 22, 2022

The Doghouse Will Be A Lonely Place For Farmer H

When Farmer H is in the doghouse, he won't have a bunk mate. Juno will stay FAR, FAR away.

On Wednesday, Farmer H got the most scathingly brilliant idea of dosing Juno and Jack with their flea and tick medicine. That thought never entered his head until I was elbow deep in the Save A Lot pizza, cutting it in half, draining a can of mushrooms, and dicing an onion.

"I'm going out to put the medicine on the dogs."
 
"Okay. Here. If you need to bribe them, I have these fish pieces from 2020 that I thawed out for them. Juno had one today, but Jack wasn't here for his treat. I think there are two left."

I knew right away that this would not end well. It wasn't long before the sounds of the process echoed through the metal kitchen door.

"Here Jack. HERE! No Juno! GET BACK! That's not yours! JACK! Come back here! See? It's food. That's for you. JUNO! GET! Okay. Now you go away. JUNO! Come here! Come on. You stupid dog! Come get your medicine! JUNO!"

I went to the door.

"Do you need my help?"

"If you think you can do anything with her. That stupid dog!"

"She's scared to death of you. You have to sweet-talk her. Come on, Juno. Come here, baby. That's a good girl. You're so pretty. Come on. That's it, sweetie. Stand right here. See? It's okay. That's a girl. Hold still. It will only take a minute. I'm so sorry. I know. Almost done. There! See? You're okay. Such a good girl. Now you'll feel better."

Farmer H barely acknowledged my help.

"If you don't need me for anything else, I'll go wash my hands and get back to getting your supper. You just need to have patience with Juno. She gets scared when you yell. Jack doesn't care. But Juno is sensitive."

I'm pretty sure Farmer H wasn't even listening to me. Every year it's the same thing when he goes to put those drops between Juno's shoulders.

6 comments:

Sioux Roslawski said...

Nobody puts Juno in the corner... or yells at her. (Three more days of school. Yipee!)

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
Farmer H might appreciate Juno more if she could carry a watermelon.

School??? Is that still a thing? Maybe the seniors can graduate from home, on Zoom...

River said...

Save yourself the stress and trouble and do the drops yourself next year or next season, whichever comes first.

Hillbilly Mom said...

River,
A few snacks on the side porch, and a soothing tone of voice, and those dogs would never know they were getting medicine drops on their back! I don't know how Farmer H could mess it up so badly. He had two whole fish planks to lure them!

Kathy's Klothesline said...

I suppose it goes without saying that I am the one who applies the drops to the animals here.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Kathy,
Yes, that doesn't need to be said. I can't even imagine HeWho doing that task! The dogs know YOU are the boss!