Once again, I'm pretty sure Farmer H is trying to kill me. To push me over the edge with his shenanigans that raise my blood pressure to higher heights.
Sunday evening, Farmer H helped me carry in some groceries. Good for him! I was lulled into a false sense of security. While putting a Save A Lot pizza in FRIG II, having liberated it from its large box, I asked Farmer H to toss out the remaining two home-grown tomatoes given to him by his buddies. They were sitting on a plate on the cutting block.
Farmer H grunted his assent, and started around the kitchen counter to toss those two disintegrating tomatoes off the back porch. I went to the sink to start washing up the previous night's bowl and silverware. Next thing I knew, Farmer H had the pizza box I had laid face-down on the cutting block, to consult when it was time to put the pizza into the oven.
"Hey! What are you doing? I need that box to see the cooking directions!"
"Huh. I thought you was done with it. I was putting it by the door."
As if that wasn't enough, I saw that Farmer H had put the tomato plate back on the cutting block. Because obviously moving it two feet into the wastebasket was too much effort.
Sweet Gummi Mary! Leaving trash, yet throwing away my needed pizza directions. I'm pretty sure this was a cold-blooded, calculated move on Farmer H's part. Nobody can be THAT clueless. Right?
6 comments:
Aren't the pizza directions always the same? You don't have them memorised by now?
Tsk on the tomato plate. How far off the back porch does stuff get tossed?
River,
No, and no. Do you only have one kind of pizza? The Save A Lot pizza is thin crust, and says to bake 12-14 minutes at 400. I think. We only have it once every few months, since I don't go to Save A Lot all that often these days. Other times we have a DiGiorno Rising Crust Pizza. It cooks longer and I don't remember the temperature. I had been getting the Freschetta brand because it was on sale at Country Mart. The ones that looked like they'd thawed and slid off the crust. They were not rising crust, and not thin crust.
We generally toss to the treeline of the woods. About 40 feet. Onion ends and peels don't go that far. Something eats it pretty quick. Not sure if it's turtles or squirrels or deer or possums or raccoons or rabbits or birds.
That makes sense when you have different kinds of pizza. I usually buy the same brand, but with different toppings and the temperature and timing is always the same.
When daughter and SIL lived on the mountain they had about two acres behind their house sloping down towards the "Aussie Bushland" bordering a state park and they used to toss stuff off their back porch too for the critters to eat. Now they are in a different house with more acreage but no bushland and the 3 chooks can only eat so much.
River,
Some things I have memorized. Like the frozen taquitos. They take 11 minutes at 400, no matter what the box says. No more or they will split. No less or they are not hot in the middle.
When we had free-roaming chickens, it was fun to toss stuff off the side porch and watch them eat and interact. They loved watermelon rinds and corn cobs.
I was warned by the neighbor I can barely see through the trees not to toss stuff down the ravine, that it was like inviting a bear invasion. Same one who told me not to plant a vegetable garden. Not listening to him anymore (he died). Not that I listened to his advice at all. I compost all my scraps. Next season they will be compost in my gardens.
Kathy,
Thank the Gummi Mary, we don't have bears out here at the Mansion. Though one has been spotted a couple times in School-Turn Town, about 10 miles away. I'm hoping he's an urban bear.
If bears break into homes and climb through windows and open cabinets and refrigerators, I am skeptical that composting will stop them from digging for treats. But that's just me. I've never had a bear in my yard. They must have more convenient feeding areas than your property!
Post a Comment