Friday, March 3, 2023

Not Quite As Bad As T-Hoe After Passing A Just-Smashed Skunk

Mrs. HM is a stinker! Not as bad as T-Hoe bathed in fresh skunk-juice, but a stinker nonetheless. I'm sure you are shocked at this revelation. As shocked as Mrs. HM upon catching a whiff of not-so-freshness earlier this week.

It was the night Farmer H had his back surgery. The day started at 2:00 a.m. when I had instructions to text and call The Pony to make sure he was up and getting ready. Then a wakeup for Farmer H himself at 3:15. And being ready to host The Pony and The Veteran when they arrived around 3:35. So I was going on no sleep, having been awaiting updates on the surgery, and doing my errands early, waiting for the return of my information-givers. Who didn't get back until 7:30 p.m. By 8:00, I was on my own again. 

I had some supper Country Mart fried chicken and green beans. Did my computing. Went to relax on the short couch while watching TV. I think it was during The Goldbergs at 11:30 p.m., while leaning sideways to ease a tension crick in my back, that I noticed it.

AN ODOR!

Whew! That stunk! My mind was racing. I guess I need to shower. I can't believe I stink this bad. It wasn't hot. I put on my antiperspirant. Why in the Not-Heaven do I smell so rotten? It must be a nervous-energy funk from my stressful day.

At that moment I sat up because I was developing a crick in my neck, and noticed my recently-removed socks draped over the back of the couch, a distance approximately six inches from my head.

Mystery solved! It's time to wash my Crocs again. My black-socked feet had been percolating in them all afternoon. 

When I related this tale to The Pony on the phone the next morning, I'm pretty sure I heard him crack a smile.

4 comments:

Kathy's Klothesline said...

I usually can smell myself when I have worked outside all day, but you put the evidence too close to your sniffer!

Hillbilly Mom said...

Kathy,
It's not like I ever work outside all day! I HAVE been meaning to wash those Crocs, having a single pair, and not one in every color, but I've been a little busy this week!

River said...

I had a similar episode a few years back, sitting on the bus I noticed an "unwashed" odour and wondered who it was, everyone near me appeared clean, then when I got off the bus the odour followed me! Everywhere I went I could smell this sweaty unwashed stink. All the way home too. Turned out to be my own cotton sunhat which I had been wearing every day for a couple of months (it was summer) and forgetting to toss it in the washing machine.

Hillbilly Mom said...

River,
Heh, heh! That's kind of like when I smelled Farmer H's sweaty camouflage cap that he wore for mowing the yard/field. Which happened to be sitting on the back of the couch behind my head.