Farmer H is providing some of the Christmas gifts for the men relatives. He had some knives in boxes, like a gift set, that included a pocket knife, and a little hunting-style knife, foldable, with a blade about 3 inches long. The handles were that brown-and-white composite called "imitation stag."
The other gift is a hat with fake fur earflaps. There are two styles, Hunter Orange and Camouflage. There were two of the orange, so I decided to give them to Farmer H's second son, The Veteran, and to my nephew, Neph. They both hunt a lot. The camouflage I'd give to HOS (Farmer H's Oldest Son), and my niece's husband, and the ex-mayor my sister's husband. I could imagine Ex-Mayor wearing it in the yard, but not out in town.
Anyhoo... don't go thinking that Farmer H just PROVIDED these gifts out of generosity. HE BILLED ME FOR THEM! Not that I mind a man making a buck. But I sometimes think he stretches a concept in order to help his business.
Anyhoo... I set out those hats to wrap them, and the very first one, which I'd picked up for The Veteran, had a black stain across the brow! Not greasy-feeling, but like somebody might have walked through fresh blacktop, and stepped on the hat. I did not wrap it. I told Farmer H when he got home, and he did not seem at all concerned.
"Well, we can't give that to anybody! You said you had more at your store."
"Um. Do you think you could bring a different one?"
"Yeah. If you don't like that one. Did you want all the same kind?"
"I want one that ISN'T STAINED!"
Sweet Gummi Mary! Sometimes it's really hard to get through to Farmer H.