Let's Add A Washboard To That World's Smallest Violin

The pity party rages on! The world's smallest violin will now be accompanied by a concert washboardist. Like every cowboy sings a sad, sad song... Mrs. HM finds another meal gone wrong.

I asked The Pony to pick me up a sandwich at the Devil's Playground on his Sunday shopping trip. He sent a text that they were out of my favorite, Roast Beef and Cheddar, and my second favorite, Ham and Cheese. But he could get the last Chicken Bacon Ranch. I concurred.

It was a realllllly LOOOOOOOONG sandwich! A normal person might have cut it into 4 servings. I had every intention of making it 3. But when I picked up my Pioneer Woman ceramic knife, my hand chopped that sammich in 2 pieces!

I never just eat the sandwich as-is. I take it apart and redistribute the meat and cheese. I don't want one side of my sandwich to have a thick layer of meat, while the other is mostly bread. I am not a bread fan. I'm an anti-breadite. Not some weirdo who would eat a Whopper served between lettuce leaves, rather than on a bun. But I DO peel out most of the bread. I save it for the next day's dog treats. That sandwich is virtually HEALTH FOOD by the time I'm done with it! ;)

Anyhoo... it's a good thing I'm so persnickety about my sandwich composition. When I was pulling the meat apart to put half on each side of the sandwich, I found an unwanted surprise!

 

THERE WAS A PAPER DIVIDER BETWEEN CHICKEN SLICES!

I've not seen these dividers in meat before, only in cheeses. Those chicken slices were folded together as if they came right out of a package. I had to peel them apart. 

I'm glad I DID!

I'm pretty sure The Devil is trying to kill me...