Thursday, June 24, 2021

Another Day Of Begrudged Servitude

I wish Farmer H would go back to his old ways of hanging out at his Storage Unit Store every waking moment. I don't know if his buddies up there have other things to do these days, or if the novelty has worn off. Farmer H is around the Mansion entirely too much. 

You know what THAT means, right? MORE WORK FOR MRS HM!

Wednesday, we had a tentative non-binding agreement to sit down at the kitchen table at 12:30, to fill out some online "paperwork" for one of Farmer H's ventures. We'd started it before, but he changed his mind a couple pages in. So... I started all over again. 

It's not exactly a collaboration when I work with Farmer H. I do all the work, while he sits across from me and reads me news items that pop up on his phone. I don't mind keeping up with current events, but when I'm on a website for the State of Missouri, reading their dry, dry instructions, and filling in info after looking up codes on assorted other sites... I can remain ignorant of worldly affairs for a couple hours.

Anyhoo... I must have been on about page four or five. They're not numbered. They just say SAVE AND CONTINUE at the bottom. But when I tried to continue, I got the PALE SCREEN OF PERPETUAL LOADING.

"Oh, no! We were only 38% done! Now it's just spinning. And it says, 'Please Do Not Press the Back Button or Refresh.' I don't know what to do!"

"Just let it go, I guess."

"We could be here all day! It's been FIVE MINUTES!"

After another couple of minutes, I got a weird screen talking about some kind of error, and possible IP something, or firewalls. I'd never seen a message quite like that page. It gave suggestions, like TRY AGAIN LATER. Not very helpful.

"I know! I'll check the IS IT DOWN website. AHA! The state website IS down! That's the problem! It's not us. WAIT A MINUTE! This says that website has been down FOR A WEEK! How do they expect people to do anything if their website is down? This is NOT a good thing! I guess we'll have to do everything all over again. Unless it locks you out when I try. There goes an hour of my life that I'll never get back!"
 
"I wish there was an office I could go to that would just let me do it there. I'd pay someone to do it. I'd drive all the way to Jeff City to do it. This here paper I got says they have an email. You could send them an email and ask about what to do with the website down."
 
"Seriously? Their website has been down for a WEEK, and you think they're going to answer emails? They don't care about reading emails. What are people gonna do if they don't answer? Send them ANOTHER email?"
 
Farmer H sometimes forgets that I'm an insider who has worked for a state agency. With that venture thwarted, Farmer H decided to do his laundry.
 
"Oh. I was going to do mine as I went to town."
 
"It will take you a while to get ready. I'll have mine out of the washer. Oh, and you need to drive me to Mick's to pick up my truck."
 
"Well, I'm not going to be ready until about 3:30."
 
"The time don't matter."
 
So off we went, Farmer H and me, his personal chauffeur. 
 
"Can you get the mail for me?"
 
"Yes. WAIT! Where are you going?"
 
"I'm parking here by the creek so you can get out and not be in the woods."
 
"I could get out over there if you park on the right side of the road."
 
"I don't think so. The Pony never could. The door won't even open against the trees. Unless I park in the MIDDLE of the gravel road, and block traffic BOTH ways. You can get out fine right here."
 
Sweet Gummi Mary! He'd argue with Helen Keller!
 
"Gosh, that sun is bright. I'd put on my sunglasses, but they're under my purse now that I had to set it on the console."
 
"Do you want me to get them for you?"
 
"NO! I don't want you messing around with my stuff. You already stepped on that spare straw I had laying there. I guess I won't be using it in an emergency if my shake straw collapses."
 
"Is there anything you don't complain about me doing?"
 
"No. I like it better when it's just me and my purse. And right now you're in Purse's seat."
 
I think tomorrow, I'll suggest that the lawn looks like it needs mowing...

3 comments:

River said...

Forget suggesting, that lawn definitely needs mowing!

Sioux Roslawski said...

Or, tell him you have St. Louis friends who are coming to visit, and they will pay good money to tour Shackytown. That will get him scurrying to get all the shacks in their best shape.

Hillbilly Mom said...

River,
Heh, heh! It sure does! I don't think the doctor meant to refrain from DRIVING a LAWNMOWER!

***
Sioux,
I assumed you were going to say to tell him they will "...pay good money to see you pull out your hose."