Yesterday I suffered an injury getting dressed after my shower. No, I did not slip on the tile of the master bathroom. We have three rugs in there. The middle rug, beside the big triangle tub, was the scene of my accident. I was partially dressed, and walking toward the walk-in closet to get my pants and shirt.
OWWWW!!!!
Something sharp pierced my right heel! It hurt like a needle had skewered my foot. Each step was agony. As I pulled on my pants, the fabric brushed against that part of my heel, and I felt the sharp implement wiggle a bit. Once dressed, I stepped into my CROCS. Still had the sharp pain.
I hobbled to the living room and called for The Pony as I continued into the laundry room to drop a small load of laundry.
"Pony! I stepped on something that is in my foot! I need you to take a look and see if you can pull it out. I can't bend and twist my knee to look at it myself." I leaned on the washer and lifted my right leg out behind me. "It's at the back of the heel, about midway, at the junction of the tough heel skin and the wrinkly skin above it."
"Huh. I see SOMETHING. A red place. But I don't see anything."
"Run your hand over it. Maybe you'll feel it. Sorry to subject you to this horror! OWW! Right there!"
"I don't feel anything. But there's a place in the skin where it's kind of peeled back. Like something WAS in there, but came out. It's red, with a little skin flap."
"I swear it feels like it's still in there."
"Where exactly did it happen? Okay, I'll go in and see if I can find anything."
"It feels like maybe a staple from Dad's prescription sack receipt."
"I didn't see anything like that. But here's a TOENAIL!"
"NOOO! Do NOT bring that out here for me to look at! NO!"
"Or maybe it's a fingernail..."
"I don't care. That should not have pierced my tough heel skin."
"And there's this stick/splinter thing, that looks like the end is broken off. It's the size of that little hole in your foot."
"Okay. Does it look like a cedar chip?"
"No. Just a little stick. I'll throw it away with the toenail."
"Thanks. It hurts SO MUCH! I'm not sure I'll be able to walk in and get my scratchers and 44 oz Diet Coke!"
I said to The Pony with a broken ankle...
4 comments:
You'll soon know if something is still in there, if it gets infected.
River,
Until NOW, I hadn't thought of that! Oh, no! I'm going to perish! I'm allergic to two of the three main antibiotic families.
The heel cup of my shoe must have cushioned it just right. Didn't hurt a bit when I was shod. But when I got back home and took off the shoe, it hurt again. This morning it was not painful, so I guess nothing is festering in there...
The lame helping the lame...
If you'd like another photo of a foot with strange toe placement (so you could help The Pony inspect YOUR foot the next time you injure it), let me know. I saved the best for last...
And would you be willing to inspect Pony's hoof?
Sioux,
WAIT! You've made me think of another title: "I'm Lamer, I'm a Blamer, I'm a Candy Crush Gamer."
No thank you to the strange toe-foot! I can't stomach it. Maybe it's a toe growing out of someone's forehead, like that Rachel Dratch character on SNL with the baby-doll arm sprouting from her noggin.
I WOULD inspect The Pony's hoof, because he's my little Pony. It might require a barf bucket around my neck. Like a reverse feedbag. For "refunding."
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